~~..SpiceUpYourLife..~~

selesai sudah berpuasa bag sekian umat islam sedunia tempoh hari dan dengan ini maka bermulalah hari raya pula..huuuuu raya sudah weii..hahaha..pasni takyah nak bangun sahur lagi (macamlah aku bangun sahur)....namun dalam pada penyediaan menyambut raya ni, hati aku amat berlainan sekali..well ia bukanlah benda baru kerana aku penah alaminya 6 tahun lepas..the same feeling strike back at the a bigger pace but with a proper handling i guess dis time..pegi shopping punyalah byk kali but cuma windows sh0ping jelah, tgk kawan2 beli dan blah..hahaha..tapi seriusly aku mmg takder mood sampai malam raya, aku still not in the mood...maybelah, maybe its still cause by the same matter..



biler raya pun kejanggalan melanda diri aku kerana bangun pun aku rasa biasa jer..ibarat hari tue adalah hari jumaat yang biasa dan bukannya hari raya..dengan cuaca hujan lebat mencurah2, lagi liat aku nak bangun but i managelah bangun jgak..serius liat nak mandi, nak jer cari cerek masak air den mandi,sejukkkkk beb..giler menggigil aku pagi tue..den blah blah..smayang raya...takbir..blah blah..khutbah..baleeeekkkk..nak gerak awal dah sbnarnya, tapi kereta aku parking dekat ngan surau, kalu aku start enjin dan gerak, comfirm org kg leh dengar...so aku dengar lah khutbah tersenguk2 sbb tak cukup tido..sapa suh tgh malam raya baru nak balek kg..padan muka aku..

but after that as a traditional nyer, salam-salaman lah aktivitinyer..tangan disusun dan dihulur dan disambut utk menghapus dosa dan salah silam yg tidak tetambus lagi..sebenarnya sebelum in aku dapat rasakan kelainan untuk sesi ni..aku dapat rasa aku akan 'hujan' time nie dan akhirnya ia berlaku..5 minit aku numb and speechles, yg mampu aku cakap "tak tau nak start dari mana"...den diam menghujani keadaan...seriusnyer aku sungguh sayu, sebak dan syahduuuu sekali..undescribe..semuanya bagaikan terlepas di saat itu sekali lagi..ianya di pendam dan dilepaskan di tempat yg tak berapa best tapi good moment lah..bag org len mungkin pelik kenapa AHMAD FAUZI boleh begini..tapi bagy my own family, they know what happen so they just maybe be quite jer..


dan kadang2 aku tertanya..adakah aku menyayangi 'dia' lebeh dari segala-galanya?lebeh dari kawan2 aku, lebih dari keluarga aku dan yg paling sadis lagi adakah lebeh daripada diri sendiri?itu tidak termasuk lagi adakah lebeh lagi daripada ALLAH S.W.T?

but no matter what happen, Hari Raya adalah untuk di sambut bersama orang yang tersayang..as fo me, this is among the person that love me and i do love them..please YA ALLAH, dont take them from me..

everything we do sumtimes must be executed according to plan...but what happen when the plan itself didnt work?frustrated isnt it..why is it happen is sumtime we always questioned about..but when come to fate, u can questioned it,its against the law..this past few weeks,its been a good weekend for me..3 season of weekend camping im going through..these camping for those 1st semester student actually and i was one of the comity member, in fact i was handling the ice breaking and the explorace slot..not to mention i was the head of camp site ajk also..so many things to be done and of coz i need to be top of my game..and as result, so many flaws i can see..high expectation but low performance i gave..what a shame i felt and what a disappointed i am now..but i just hope they atleast satisfy with my performance..that the least i can do at the moment..but what the head lights in this 3rd season was, the level itself..it was lower than the 1st season where its sumhow not so good compare to the 2nd season where it was a blast n almost perfect..thats the benchmarhe we have for now..

the other highlight is the heavy rain..the storm came at dawn and it was heavy..flooded come across us on the base camp, the electricity was cut off due to short circuit at the generator..lucky we have mr mamu to save the day..i was shocked and seriously frightened,almost numb but luckily im not..i keep going and try to do what i can do to save the day..when i look at the camp site, i was disappointed with myself..the student was messy and not lah so good condition as i thought it will be..poor the participatent, they have to clean up all the mess be4 they can go to sleep..

but that's life i guess..when things wont come in ur way, u need to clean up the mess or u'll be living in a messed up life..

akan ku tunggu dan terus menungggu,
bukan kepulanganmu tapi kehadiran yang baru

..INSYAALLAH..

kenapa misti hari rabu adalah hari yg menyeksakan bg aku..jarang sekali hari rabu akan mendatangkan ketenangan kepada aku..aku sudah penat tapi hati aku masih sakit..arini aku nak masuk kelas mcm kesengalan tahap maksima sbb aku sudenly blur tak tau nak ajar apa..sungguh blur..ASTARGHFIRULLAHALAZIM,kenapa mesti jadi mcm nie..pagi nie, man boleh lak datang n cerita kat aku, "pau,gambar tu mmg best,sesuai korang dua"..wow,terima kasih man kerana penyataan tue..aku sungguh 'terharu' sgt..gambar tu sebnarnya mmg bag kenangan yg besar bg aku..siapa sangka yg gambar tue akan membawa kami berdua ke dalam lembah kebahagiaan sementara..well,bagi akulahh kan,bg dier aku tak tau..jadi biler tgk balek gambar tue,semua kenangan yg lampau tiba2 masuk balek..

ann make it worst, she came into my dream..wahhhh,best kan..and it was her engagement day on that dream..terasa saket hati aku, namun aku tak mahu tunjuk lagi,aku tak mahu mengadu lagi,aku ingin simpan dan ia akan disimpan untuk aku..biralah rahsia...aku akan cuba senyum untuk anda semua..mera nam 'JOKER'..